I logged onto the blog today and I saw that almost FIVE HUNDRED PEOPLE have visited this page. My jaw almost dropped. A couple days ago when I started this whole thing, I had about six people (and those were just friends and family).
I'm noticing now that I might be speaking to a larger audience than I would have ever thought. And with that comes a lot of pressure in my mind. I want to say the right things, motivate as many people possible, and change as many lives as I can through my writing.
So where does that leave me now? Where do I go from here?
Just like so many other Americans, I want things done NOW. I want things done in the snap of my fingers. I hate waiting on lines, waiting for a package to come, or waiting for a professor to grade a test that I studied extensively for. I hate waiting because I want things done on my time and my time only. Like most Americans, we want to be IN CONTROL.
We have been told ALL OUR LIVES that time is so valuable and priceless. We have been told ALL OUR LIVES that we can never get time back and to hold on to each and every moment. To hold each moment close. So, why would I want to be spending my "priceless" time waiting on line at the Motor Vehicle Association? Why would I want to be giving other people the power to control my time?
I think this is a problem with my generation as a whole. I am one to believe that I am in a generation like no other. Do we make mistakes? 110%. But, I am a firm believer that my generation is a generation that PURSUES what we want to accomplish. We are living in times that are so uncertain. I, for one, am a college student in the middle of a global pandemic. Times like this allow for people like me to chase my dreams. We go after things WE WANT, and we want nobody else to hold us back from what we want to accomplish.
We do not want people getting in our way. We know what we want-and we go after it. Since we are living in such unprecedented times (I wish I had a nickel for every single time I heard this on the news), we know that anything could happen at any moment. So, when we do what we want to do, we do not want anybody else from stopping or challenging us. We want things done on our time and on the snap of our fingers.
As much as people might think that this idea of determination and drive is a good thing, it can also be dangerous as well. We do not take the time to breathe. We do not take the time to relax and cherish the things in our life that mean so much to us. Instead, we are running here and there- this activity to the next activity. We don't stop. We are always in a rush to do the next thing.
Then, years later, we look back on some of our greatest times, and say, "Wow, I really wish I enjoyed those days more." And then we continue on our wild and high-speed lives.
Why can't we stay in one place? Why does it make us happy to be always on the run and always chasing the next event? Are we afraid to be doing nothing? Are we afraid that we will be left behind in a world that is moving so quickly?
I am on social media a lot so I see a lot of "influencers" or "famous" people in our generation that cannot go without posting at least five or six pictures a day. They cannot go a day without hanging out with other "famous" people and making a name for themselves. I see this everyday-even some of the people I have grown up with. People ALWAYS have to be hanging out with people, ALWAYS have to be at parties and with other "popular people". And then, these same people make fun of others who are "quiet" or people who study instead of going out. Some people are more obsessed with their social status and not so much with their own personal self and what they could accomplish. Why do some people chase the approval of other people? Why are some people more obsessed with being "popular" than being their own selves? Are people afraid they will lose their "social status" or their fame?
I am sure everybody that is reading this article can relate to this. Everybody knows a person who is more obsessed with being popular or going to parties than accomplishing anything. And I am not going to sit here and pretend that I didn't used to be like that myself. In my teenage years and beginning stages of college, I was more interested in partying, status, and my ego. I never sat down to ever think, "What can I contribute to this world?" I noticed, in the summer after my freshman year, that I was going nowhere if I kept those same attitudes up. I realized that I needed to make a difference in the world, rather than trying to fit in. We already have WAY TOO MANY people in this world that just try to fit in with "the crowd" or other "popular" people. The world does not have enough people that want to stand out, use their gifts, and be their true self. For some reason, we feel like we are going to be judged or made fun of if we are our true selves. WHY IS THIS? We have ONE LIFE to live. Why spend our ONE LIFE trying to fit in with everyone else?
For a while, I was trying to have my social media "perfect" to others who might see it. I wanted to have the best looking photos of myself and pictures with large amounts of friends. I wanted to show off to anybody that might be visiting my profile that I was "popular", "good-looking", and "fun" to be around. I was trying so hard to make an image of myself. I was trying so hard to form my profile into something I wanted it to be, rather than who I actually was. I wanted other people to think that I was constantly with people and always looked good. When in reality, I would think to myself that I never had best friends. I had friends on the outside surface level, but when I was alone, I would feel lonely. Nobody would ever think of this if they saw my Instagram or my snapchat. But as I grew up more and stopped relying on my social media gratification, I started to find actual TRUE, lifelong friends that I DIDN'T HAVE TO post on my social media. I didn't have to show them off on my social media accounts to validate my friendship with them. I stopped posting on my social media who I was hanging out with and what I was doing all the time. I started to live in the moment and cherish the time with people I was with. And I am so happy now. I have some hands-down AMAZING, down-to-earth people in my life that I would do anything for. I have a girlfriend that loves me for who I am and supports me through thick and thin. I have best friends that have my back no matter what. And, I have a family that pushes me to be my true self. I do not have to "put on airs" (as my mom would say) with people anymore. I am my true self and if somebody doesn't want to be friends with me or be seen with me-then that is fine by me. Your TRUE FRIENDS are going to form and be there when you are your TRUE self. You will only have fake friends in your life if you are always trying to be somebody who you are not. Real people will cling to real people.
It goes for me and this blog. I ended up posting about this blog on my social media. Will people think I am odd for wanting to make an inspirational writing blog? Oh, for sure. Will people stop talking to me and think I am weird? There's a good chance. And do I care? Not a single bit. Because I learned that my happiness doesn't depend on peoples' verification. I do not rely on the acceptance of other people to be happy. I am going to do what I love to do- which is writing, inspiring people, and helping others. And if somebody does not want to be friends with me (for whatever reason) because I am choosing to do this with my life, then that is fine with me. But, the people who decide to always stay with me, support me with what I am doing, and be in my life no matter what, then I will hold them very close. And love them as hard as I can.
And to conclude a large tangent that I went on, I think that it is important for us to take some time to just enjoy life. Get off social media. Stop trying so hard to please others or make a name for yourself. Be your own true person. Stop thinking that just because you don't "go to that party" or "go hang out with those people" that you would somehow be "forgotten". You won't be forgotten. I promise you that. Because in reality, the people that would forget about you, are NOT the people you want to be having in your life. The people that leave you on "read" or don't put any effort into your friendship/relationship are NOT the people you want to be having in your life.
Sometimes I honestly think that my own main purpose in life is to motivate and inspire others. I feel as if that is why God put me on this earth. Would a nice car, a big house, and a lavishly rich life be fun? Yeah for sure. But at the end of the day, the feeling of helping others through dark times or encouraging people to be great is a feeling that I wouldn't trade for the world. That feeling when I know that I made real change is what I live for. That feeling of knowing that I was a dim light in a world that is so dark gives me inspiration. THAT gets me out of bed in the morning. THAT drives me. That feeling to know that I am making a difference just by being myself.
And I encourage YOU who is reading this to do the same. Be nice to the people who you encounter throughout the day. It could be a fast food worker, another shopper you pass in Walmart, a homeless person, or a lady walking her dog. Give them a little more kindness than usual. Because if you don't, who else will? Be the change. Make a change.
Let's make this world a happier place. One smile at a time.
-TJO
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